Snake Oil Salesmen


My Aunt and Uncle bought a timeshare in Pagosa Springs Colorado. Pagosa Springs is a very small town in Southern Colorado, as of 2020 it has a population of 1,571. Unless something drastic changes, I do not foresee its population growing any time soon. Of course, because why not, Pagosas’ entire economic system is based on its 100 year enduring wellness tourism industry. There are hot springs in Pagosa Springs. Kinda in the name. Hot springs that, 100 years ago, promised to cure everything ranging from depression to leprosy. I guess you could say these are “magic” springs. Well I guess not “you could say” I mean, afterall, the city’s website makes sure to boldly proclaim the statement as a near fact on the front page of its official website. & why wouldn't  I trust the local officials of the governing body of Pagosa Springs? It must be true. 


Anyway, throughout the first half of the 21st century most of my family has dipped themselves into the warm sulfur smelling “magic” springs of Pagosa. This includes my Grandmother. Her name was Wanda Cook. She died of Pancreatic Cancer in 2014. I did not know her very well, but I can still picture her face anytime I close my eyes. She was beautiful. She introduced me to both fig newtons and silly cheese, not however, at the same time. To be fair to the most definitely real “magical” healing properties of Pagosa, she had not yet gotten cancer when she dipped her body beneath its bubbles. That came years after. I guess the springs only cure your current ailments? If only we had known. Maybe instead of years of chemo, she could have just gone back to Pagosa and rested her body in those springs once more. Maybe she would have healed instantly. Maybe she would have never died. Omnipresent Wanda Cook, goddess of time, watcher of all infinite seasons of Dance Moms. 


 I do know for certain she would have loved to visit her favorite Tex-Mex restaurant Tequila’s one last time. Tex-Mex.. in Colorado… Our family lives in Texas by the way. 11 years ago I think I heard her jokingly say that their chicken enchiladas must have been made by the hands of God. 11 years later I think to myself that they were probably made by a 24 year old named Zach.